Teach your child these 7 phrases to use when approached by a stranger

The thought of my child being approached by a stranger can send shivers down my spine. It’s a scenario we never want to imagine, yet it’s crucial to prepare for.

It’s about more than just memorizing the phrase ‘stranger danger’. It’s about equipping our little ones with the right language to handle such situations with confidence and safety.

I’ve always believed that words hold power and teaching our kids the right phrases in this context can make all the difference.

In this piece, I’m going to share with you some key phrases that your child must know when they are approached by a stranger.

These phrases are not meant to frighten, but to empower. To give your child the very tools they need to navigate uncertain situations.

So, buckle up as we delve into helping you teach your child these 7 phrases to use when approached by a stranger.

1) “I need to find my mom/dad”

When it comes to arming our children with phrases to use when approached by a stranger, this one is a classic.

Yet, it’s undeniably effective.

The key here is that it communicates a very clear message. The child is not alone and there is an adult who is expected to be around.

Teaching your child to immediately express their need to find you can create a sense of urgency. It’s a subtle way of saying, “You’re not who I should be talking to.”

But, the delivery of this phrase is just as important as the words themselves. Teach your child to say it confidently and loudly enough for others around to hear.

This phrase isn’t meant to scare your child, rather it aims to give them a sense of control over the situation. And that’s what we’re trying to achieve here, isn’t it? Empowering our children while ensuring their safety.

“I need to find my mom/dad” is more than just a phrase. It’s an assertive statement that can keep your child safe in an uncertain situation.

2) “I don’t talk to strangers”

Let’s delve into a bit of psychology here.

The concept of Stranger Danger is something that’s often taught to children from a young age. It’s a simple, yet effective rule: don’t interact with people you don’t know.

But, here’s the thing…

Just telling your child not to talk to strangers might not be enough. Why? Because it can be confusing for them. After all, they see us, their parents, talking to strangers all the time.

That’s why it’s important to teach them this phrase: “I don’t talk to strangers.”

It’s a clear and direct statement that firmly establishes a boundary. Instead of leaving them confused about what constitutes a ‘stranger’, this phrase gives them an actionable response.

This way, your child isn’t just passively adhering to the Stranger Danger rule. They are actively asserting it.

And believe me, this small change can make a big difference in how your child responds to an uncomfortable situation.

3) “Can you help me find a police officer?”

Now, we’ve just talked about the notion of not speaking with strangers. But let’s consider a slightly different perspective.

There might be situations where your child needs to ask for help from an unknown adult. This is where the phrase “Can you help me find a police officer?” comes into play.

Rather than asking the stranger directly for help, this phrase redirects the request to a trusted authority figure, like a police officer.

This provides a level of safety for your child because it subtly communicates that they’re looking for someone who can offer official assistance.

It prompts your child to think critically about who is safe to approach when they need help.

In essence, this phrase balances the need for caution with the reality that sometimes strangers might be the only ones able to offer immediate assistance.

4) “I have to check with my parents first”

Have you ever thought about how often we, as adults, seek a second opinion before making a decision?

This is a habit we can instill in our children as well. Especially when it comes to interacting with strangers.

Teach your child the phrase, “I have to check with my parents first.”

This phrase works as a buffer. It gives your child an opportunity to step away and seek your guidance. Moreover, it sends a clear message to the stranger that your child is not autonomous and their actions are monitored by their parents.

This phrase encourages your child to seek counsel before making decisions, a valuable life skill that goes beyond the context of stranger danger.

5) “I’m not allowed to go anywhere without my parents”

As parents, we always strive to keep our children safe and within our sight. But what about those times when we’re not around?

This is where the phrase “I’m not allowed to go anywhere without my parents” can be a lifesaver.

When I first taught this phrase to my child, it was with the hope that it would create a strong mental boundary. A rule that they could fall back on when faced with a tempting offer to go somewhere with a stranger.

And believe me, it works.

It reminds them of our family rules, even when we’re not physically present. It gives them confidence to assert themselves and say no.

Let’s remember, it’s not just teaching our children to be cautious of strangers. It’s empowering them with the right words to keep themselves safe, no matter what.

6) “I need to go now”

There was a time when my own child found himself in an uncomfortable conversation with a stranger. Despite the stranger’s friendly demeanor, my son felt the need to distance himself. And the phrase that came to his rescue was, “I need to go now.”

This phrase acts as a polite yet assertive exit strategy. It clearly communicates your child’s intention to leave the situation without causing unnecessary confrontation.

My heart swelled with pride when my son shared this incident with me. It showed me that he had grasped the importance of these phrases and knew when to use them.

Empathy plays a big role here. We need to understand that it’s not easy for our children to navigate these situations. But giving them phrases like “I need to go now” can equip them with the means to handle such encounters with confidence and safety.

7) “No, thank you”

There’s something incredibly powerful about teaching your child to say, “No, thank you” when a stranger offers them something. It’s a simple, yet effective way of expressing refusal without being rude.

Consider the following situations where this phrase could be useful:

  • A stranger offers candy or a toy
  • A stranger invites them to see a puppy in a car
  • A stranger offers a ride home

In each of these situations, “No, thank you” is a polite and firm way for your child to assert themselves and maintain their personal safety.

It’s more than just instructing them to say no. It’s about instilling in them the knowledge that they have the right to decline. And that’s a lesson worth teaching.

What’s next in our child’s safety journey?

We’ve covered a lot of ground in this article, equipping our children with phrases to use when approached by strangers. However, let’s remember that this is just one step in the larger journey of ensuring our child’s safety. So, what’s next?

  • Role-playing scenarios: Practice makes perfect. Role-playing these phrases and scenarios with your child can help them understand when and how to use them.
  • Identifying safe strangers: Not all strangers are a threat. Teach your child to identify ‘safe’ strangers like police officers or teachers.
  • Understanding body language: Communication isn’t just verbal. Teach your child to understand and react to non-verbal cues as well.

As we wrap up, let’s take a moment to reflect on our own roles as parents and guardians. How are we facilitating our child’s understanding of safety? How are we encouraging them to voice their concerns and discomforts?

Our children look up to us. Let’s lead by example and create a safe, open dialogue about personal safety with them. Because their safety isn’t just about what they say—it’s also about what we do as parents.

Tina Fey

Tina Fey

Tina Fey is a nomadic writer with a background in psychology, specializing in child development. Born and raised in diverse cultural settings, she developed a deep understanding of human behavior and the intricacies of parenting. Driven by her passion for helping others, Tina now contributes to Careful Parents, offering practical advice and insights drawn from her expertise and experiences. Through her articles, she aims to empower parents with effective strategies for nurturing healthy relationships and fostering their children's growth.

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