Motherhood — it’s a journey we embark on with love and joy, but let’s admit it, it can often feel like it has consumed our entire life.
The late-night feedings, the diaper changes, the playdates, not to mention the constant worry.
It’s easy to feel like you’ve lost yourself in the process of becoming someone’s mom.
Trust me, I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to look in the mirror and wonder if there’s anything left of the woman who existed before motherhood.
But it doesn’t have to be this way.
In this article, I’m going to share 7 tips that helped me regain a sense of self and balance in my life after becoming a mother.
1) Embrace the Chaos
When it comes to motherhood, chaos is often the order of the day.
Yes, you heard me right.
The unpredictability, the mess, the constant change – it’s all part of this beautiful journey.
But here’s the thing: it doesn’t mean you have to be overwhelmed by it all the time.
You see, once I accepted that chaos could be a part of my life and not necessarily an enemy, things started to shift for me.
I learned to find moments of calm within the chaos. Whether it was a five-minute meditation while my baby napped or enjoying a quick cup of coffee in silence before everyone woke up.
The key here is not to fight the chaos but rather, to flow with it.
It’s about finding your own ways to carve out peace amidst all the unpredictability.
And trust me, once you learn how to do this, you’ll start feeling more in control and less like a ship lost at sea.
2) Practice Mindfulness
Now, you might be thinking, “What’s mindfulness got to do with feeling like I have a life again?”
Mindfulness is a psychological concept that focuses on being intensely aware of what you’re sensing and feeling in the moment, without interpretation or judgment.
In motherhood, it’s easy to get caught up in the countless tasks that need our attention.
But, what if, instead of constantly worrying about what needs to be done next, you could train yourself to be fully present in the moment?
Practicing mindfulness allows us to truly engage with our children, savor the little moments, and find joy even in the mundane.
Sure, it won’t make the diaper changes or tantrums disappear. But it will help you approach these situations with more patience and less stress.
3) Define Your Version of Success
What does success look like to you as a mother?
In this era of social media, it’s easy to get caught up in comparing ourselves with others. We see posts of perfectly organized homes, gourmet meals, and children engaged in elaborate craft projects.
That’s not reality for most of us.
Your version of success might be getting through the day without any major meltdowns (yours or your child’s). Or perhaps it’s managing to have a shower and put on clean clothes.
Success is personal and unique to each individual. It’s crucial to define what it means for you and not let others’ standards dictate it.
You’re doing the best you can, and that in itself is a huge success.
4) Be Honest with Yourself and Others
Motherhood is not always picture-perfect moments and giggles. It’s messy, challenging, and sometimes downright exhausting.
And it’s okay to admit it. In fact, it’s healthy.
Here’s what being honest in motherhood might look like:
- Admitting you’re overwhelmed and need help.
- Confessing that you miss your pre-motherhood life sometimes.
- Acknowledging that not every moment with your child is blissful.
There’s no shame in any of these admissions. They don’t make you a bad mother. They make you human.
Allow yourself to be vulnerable, to be real. It’s one of the most liberating things you can do for yourself as a mother.
5) Connect with Other Moms
I remember the first time I walked into a mom’s group. I was nervous, unsure, and felt utterly out of place.
But as I started talking to other moms, I realized something. We were all in the same boat.
You see, motherhood can sometimes feel like a lonely journey. But it doesn’t have to be. There’s an entire community of mothers out there who are going through the same joys, fears, and challenges as you are.
Let’s step out of our comfort zones. Join a local mom’s group, participate in online forums, or even start your own community.
Having a support network of fellow moms can provide much-needed camaraderie, empathy, and even some practical tips for navigating motherhood. It’s a game-changer!
6) Reevaluate Your Priorities
Imagine this: you’ve managed to get your baby to nap, the house is quiet, and you finally have a moment to yourself. What do you choose to do with this precious time?
Is it rushing around to clean the house? Or maybe catching up on work emails?
While these tasks might be important, are they truly the best use of your me-time?
Motherhood often prompts us to reassess our priorities. What may have seemed crucial before might not hold the same importance now.
Ask yourself: What truly matters to me now? What brings me joy and fulfillment?
It’s okay to let go of certain expectations and focus on what makes you and your family happiest.
7) Remember, This Too Shall Pass
If there’s one thing I want you to take away from this article, it’s this: remember that everything is temporary.
The sleepless nights, the tantrums, the feeling of losing yourself – they’re all but fleeting moments in the grand journey of motherhood.
I recall a particularly tough day when my little one wouldn’t stop crying, and I felt utterly helpless. In the midst of my exhaustion, a wise friend reminded me, “This too shall pass.”
And you know what? She was right.
As we conclude our list, hold this thought close. No matter how tough the day or how long the night, bear in mind that it’s just a phase. It will pass. And with each passing phase, you’ll discover new joys and a stronger version of yourself.
Are You Ready to Reclaim Your Life?
As we reach the end of this article, I want you to reflect on all we’ve discussed. Motherhood is a journey, and like any journey, it comes with its ups and downs.
But you’re not alone. And you’re stronger than you think.
Here are a few more strategies that can help:
- Consider seeking professional help if you’re feeling overwhelmed or experiencing signs of postpartum depression.
- Try to maintain a regular sleep schedule to ensure your mental and physical wellbeing.
- Don’t hesitate to ask for help from family and friends. It’s not a sign of weakness but of strength.
As you navigate this beautiful chaos called motherhood, I hope these tips will guide you in reclaiming your life, one step at a time.
It’s okay to put yourself first sometimes. After all, a happy mom equals a happy home.
And with that thought, I leave you to embark on this journey of self-discovery and growth. You’ve got this!
